The Season of Hard

I'll start with a statement on blogging: I agree with a friend who said sometimes reading other people's blogs makes me compare myself too much. At times I feel like blogging is like a Family Christmas Letter, you have to pick all the great things that are going on in life to share. I feel hesitant to blog because my life just isn't like that, but really I don't know anyone whose life is like that. So, here's to being real...

All that to say I haven't blogged in a while maybe because it has taken me a whole month to get over the holidays or maybe because I just have known quite what to say. We don't have any thing "Christmas Card Letter-ish" to report. True my kids are wonderful they are growing and making us laugh every day. Jared still has a good job that hasn't been rocked too much in this hard economy. We do have so much to be thankful for, but we have also been reminded of how hard life is at times.

The fall of 2008 unfolded in ways we would have never imagined. I've tried so hard to analyze what is going on and put a name on it, but it is hard for us to know exactly what God is up to. So, for now this is our "Season of Hard". Not one thing in particular, but lots of hard situations and hard decisions to be made.

We moved in August of last year, we knew all along that it was a temporary more. We feel amazingly blessed to be in the house that we are in. Yet we are still uncertain of our next move. We want so much to know where we will be long term, to find place to settle down and starting planting some roots. We have some decisions before us about where to live and what to do with some land that we own. These aren't easy decisions. I think we change our mind weekly on them. We are prayerfully considering all our options and waiting for the Lord's answer. We do trust that the Lord has the right home waiting for our family. Through this process we are ever reminded that this earth is not our home and we will never be fully settled here.

Also, I have had a very difficult time recovering from my illness in September, not just physically but emotionally too. It has been long and hard, but I'm starting to feel better all around. We have sick and hurting family and friends. I could go on, basicallly there are lots of other situations that are burdening our hearts.

Honestly I fluctuate between seeing the big picture that God is working all these little things out and feeling hopeless. I have been reminded to hold onto hope, a verse I've been holding onto lately is:

Colossians 1:27 "To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery which is Christ in you, the hope of glory."

It is so encouraging to me that the mystery is Christ in me and far too often in the midst of the craziness of life I forget that I have "the hope of glory"!

The first time I heard this song by Sanctus Real I thought "how did they get in my head?". I love the line that says "It feels like chaos, but somehow there's peace". I can so relate.



So, for us 2009 is the year of hope. I'm also hoping that in retrospect we will be able to give this season a good name. Once we have finished passing through it.